Adventure - Hvar

Adventure: Hvar — Harbors, Hills, and Yara’s Attempted Resort Takeover

Hvar was an instant favorite — bright, warm, and full of that easy island energy that makes you slow down without even trying. The harbor alone could keep you entertained for hours. Mid‑sized ships drift in all day, and by evening they stack up like a floating apartment complex. One night I counted eleven tied together, gently rocking in the water. Yara stared at them like she was choosing which one she wanted delivered to her doorstep.

The Fortress — Views That Make the Climb Worth It

We hiked up to Hvar Fortress, the medieval stronghold overlooking the town. The climb is steep, winding through old stone paths and pine trees, but the view from the top is unreal — terracotta rooftops, the Pakleni Islands, and the Adriatic stretching out like a sheet of glass.

Yara said the fortress “had potential,” but needed “a better throne room.”

Clock Tower & Old Town

We wandered past the clock tower, through narrow stone alleys, and into the old squares where cafés spill out into the sun. Yara critiqued the tower for “not chiming enough,” but otherwise approved.

First Stop: Hvar Brewery

Before any serious exploring, we stopped at Hvar Brewery. A cold beer on a warm island is hard to beat.
Yara sniffed the air dramatically and said, “Finally, culture.”

Šetalište Tonija Petrića — The Waterfront Walk

We walked along Šetalište Tonija Petrića, the long seaside promenade lined with palm trees, cafés, and views of the harbor. It’s the perfect place to wander slowly and pretend you’re in a postcard.

Yara said it needed “more velvet seating,” but otherwise tolerated it.

Hula Hula — Sunset Vibes

We stopped at Hula Hula, the famous beach bar with loud music, loungers, and a perfect sunset view. It’s the kind of place where people show up for one drink and accidentally stay for three hours.

Yara said she would like to “own it.”

My Apartment — A Balcony With a View (and a Hill to Earn It)

I stayed in a place with a fantastic balcony view — the kind that makes you want to sit outside for hours. The only catch: it was uphill. Very uphill.

Yara said the climb was “unacceptable,” even though she didn’t walk a single step.

The Pink Champagne — The Nightlife Landmark

I walked past the Pink Champagne — the party club that only opens at night. Even during the day, it looked like it was recovering from last night’s chaos.
Yara said she wanted to go inside “to inspect the dance floor,” but it was closed.

Napoleon Fortress — Beautiful, but Closed

We hiked all the way up to the Napoleon Fortress, only to discover it’s not open to the public. The good news: the views are spectacular — the entire island, the sea, and the harbor spread out below.

Yara said, “This should be mine,” which is becoming a theme.

Yara’s Official Hvar Rankings

After “careful evaluation,” Yara issued her rankings:

1. Hvar Grand Beach Resort

“Obviously the best. They should reserve a suite for me permanently.”

2. Hvar Fortress

“Excellent views. Needs a throne room.”

3. Hula Hula Beach Bar

“Good energy. I will own it someday.”

4. The Harbor

“Acceptable. Needs more yachts.”

5. My Apartment

“Too uphill. Balcony view is nice, though.”

6. The Pink Champagne

“Closed. Unacceptable.”

Yara Tries to Check Herself Into the Hvar Grand Beach Resort

At one point, we walked past the Hvar Grand Beach Resort, and Yara froze. She stared at the balconies, the palm trees, the private beach, and said, “This is where I belong.”

Before I could stop her, she demanded to be carried to the front desk.

I humored her.

She stood on the counter like a tiny porcelain dignitary and announced:

“I require a suite. Preferably the entire top floor.”

The receptionist blinked.
I apologized.
Yara insisted she was “not a guest — a VIP.”
The receptionist laughed.
Yara did not.

I carried her out before she tried to negotiate a long‑term lease.

Hvar was beautiful — harbors, hills, sunsets, and stone streets warmed by centuries of footsteps.
Yara loved it too, though she spent most of the time demanding resorts, yachts, and thrones.

todd@FollowTheRide.com